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On constant stimulation, why you feel jumpy when you put down your phone, and a concept I invented
Today, I wanted to share about Stimulation Differentials.
“Stimulation Differentials” is a term I invented. They’re helpful for understanding why you might use technology or food in a way that doesn’t serve you — or why you’re a bit anxious… all the time.
Here’s the idea:
Going from a high-stimulation environment to a low-stimulation environment (e.g., going across a “stimulation differential”) can feel uncomfortable or agitating in our bodies, especially if we’re not accustomed to making this transition.
And in 2021, many of us are extremely unaccustomed to making this transition.
Let me say more:
Our bodies get revved up, to some degree, when we do something with more stimulation. So once we take that stimulation away, our bodies are still revved up.
Here are examples of when this can happen:
You’re checking Instagram on your phone (higher stimulation)…and you turn it off (lower stimulation).
You’ve been at work (higher stimulation — you had a lot to think about, and people to interface with), and you just got home (lower stimulation).
You go from exploring the supermarket (higher stimulation) to waiting in line to check out (lower stimulation — fewer things to explore, do, and think about).
If you’re not accustomed to the process of calming your nervous system, then suddenly noticing all of these stimulating body sensations can feel surprising and disorienting. You may feel uncomfortable, agitated, or jumpy — like you want to jump out of your skin.
Or maybe you never notice the Stimulation Differential at all — you just notice that you need to take out your phone and check something when you have a minute of time in between activities. You notice that you need to eat a cookie as soon as you come home from work every day.
In 2021, many of us almost never bridge the Stimulation Differential but rather keep ourselves chronically stimulated, because we are afraid of the slight discomfort of being more stimulated than our environment.
But this is a serious loss because those moments of emptiness and lower stimulation are when:
Our brains truly recover — so we can approach our next task with the maximum amount of focus and creativity.
We get intentional about our next action, rather than simply reactive.
We have insights about what we truly want in life.
We recover and find the spaciousness, grounded-ness, and calm that so many of us yearn for.
When my 1:1 coaching clients tell me that they’re chronically a little bit anxious or they don’t know what they want from life, one thing I often explore is whether they are allowing themselves to come down — to truly land in a lower-stimulation environment.
Or are they just keeping themselves stimulated all of the time?
If we’re constantly stimulated all of the time, how can we expect to feel calm, less anxious, or clearer on our lives?
…
I saved the best news for last:
Once you get accustomed to bridging the Stimulation Differential…it’s actually not so uncomfortable.
You just know that, for example, at the end of your workday you are a little revved up. So you need to let your body come down by — perhaps — reading a book for a half hour (rather than going on the internet, which would also be stimulating).
Which is to say: what’s hard about Stimulation Differentials actually is significantly reduced by practice.
So this week, I’ll ask: are you avoiding bridging your Stimulation Differentials? If so, how’s that working for you?
I’m in your corner rooting for you.
Katie
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How lying on the floor can calm our nervous system (and why I love doing it)
I’ve discovered a new, useful life technique, and I wanted to share it with you:
It’s called “lying on the floor.”
Haha, good joke, Katie, you might be thinking.
Except I’m serious. Lying on the floor has been extremely useful for me recently. Here are some times that I’ve done it:
After I walk in the house, after driving home from anywhere — the public library, the grocery store, going to a social event.
This was particularly pronounced in the pre-COVID era, when I, well… went more places. But even now: I’ve noticed that if I pay attention, I often have sensations and buzzing in my chest and belly in those moments — even if I’m coming from a place I liked, and even if I’m about to do something that I like at home!
After I finish up with a life coaching client, and am about to move on to the rest of my day.
That same feeling I described above — sensation and buzzing in my chest and belly — comes up here, too. Even if I had an awesome, fun, satisfying session with a client (which most of them are!) Even if I’m about to go do something else that I want to do!
After I finish up one piece of work, and before I move on to something else.
Can you guess how it feels in my body? Yep, there’s sensation and buzzing in my chest and belly.
After I finish up one personal activity on a weekend, and before I move on to the next one.
(I think you get the picture here.)
Lying on the floor grounds me — literally, of course, but it also grounds my nervous system — leaving me feeling calmer and clearer. My breathing slows down, my thinking gets less reactive and more intentional, and I tend to get up from the floor and make better choices — about my work, about my technology use, my eating… everything.
You might notice that nearly all the moments I listed are about transition moments. I’m transitioning from one thing to another (“being out” to “being home”, “seeing a client” to “the rest of my day,” etc.).
I’ve been writing for a while now about how transitions can bring up surprising feelings (here for transitions and technology, here for transitions and eating). I say “surprising” because, even after gathering a lot of data about my personal experiences and those of my clients, I’m still often surprised by the feelings or sensations that can come up! All that happened was that I walked in the door of my house! Why do I have such body sensations now?
…
And, if you’re new to me and my writing, you might be a little concerned when I write about having “feelings or sensations” in my body. You might be worrying: Is something wrong, Katie?
To be honest, typically nothing serious is wrong. If I’m paying attention, I’ll get some sensations in my body— or some slight agitation — many times a day. Sometimes it’s related to something in my life that has meaning or needs to be addressed. For example: I feel subtly anxious about my conversation with a certain person! Or I’m slightly nervous about getting that project done!
But often it just has to do with being a person who has a body — the sensations might just be telling me, for example, that I’m just a little bit tired after driving home — and it’s good to take 60 seconds to rest and focus on my breathing before moving on to the next thing.
Of course, there are some times when I’ll lie on the floor that aren’t transitions. When I’ve been writing for a while and am frustrated or tired, for example. You might find that this technique is useful as a break in the middle of a project.
…
And, to be clear, I’m typically only on the floor for somewhere between 90 seconds and a couple of minutes. It’s short!
Of course, maybe you’re not interested in being on the floor. Or maybe you’re at work and it would be extremely inappropriate! The purpose of this amazing life hack is to give some space and “cushion” into your life, but other locations would perform the same purpose:
You could sit in a chair and gaze out the window or even at a wall — this might be a more socially appropriate action to take at work or in public.
If you work in an office, even a "chair" in a quiet bathroom stall or abandoned conference room would work!
If you’re home, you could lie on a couch or a bed, instead of the floor.
More important than the exact method is the acknowledgment of what’s actually happening. It can be inconvenient to notice that, for example, we have some agitating body sensations coming up. But if we don’t acknowledge them, we may— often unconsciously — push them down using technology, eating, or something else.
The problem with using technology or eating in those moments, though, is that we may end up using them in ways that don’t serve us — wasting too much time checking our email or social media, for example, or eating more food than we need.
So why not explore lying on the floor? If you’re a “beginner” at this method, it can be nice to set a timer for 1-2 minutes to give you a bit of structure.
Why not make “…and then I lie on the floor” the default thing you do in transitions or as a “break”? Instead of, say, picking up your phone.
You’ve got this.
Katie
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