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Tech with Intention: Four ideas for how I reduce my technology usage

Many of us have developed a pro-technology bias: if something can be done with technology, it should be done with technology.

Katie Seaver, life coach, how much technology is too much, how to use less technology, unplugging from technology, disconnecting from social media, reducing screen time

Of course, technology often saves us time and effort. Using my maps app, for example, is a lot easier for me than old-fashioned paper maps.

But also, there are costs.

A big one for me? Once I use technology for one thing, I’m likely to stay on and do other things. If I open my calendar app to check my schedule, I’m tempted to check my email. And once I’ve checked my email, why not hop on social media for a few minutes?

As I’ve gotten more intentional about my technology usage, it’s become clear to me that just because you can solve a problem using technology, doesn’t mean that you should.

I wanted to share a couple of things I’ve done to implement this idea in my own life:

1. I use a paper calendar.

Like many people, I have many professional and personal events each day.  So I check my calendar frequently, to stay on top of everything.

A few years ago, I realized that every time I opened my online calendar, I was tempted to do something else: check my email, check social media, and quickly “look up” something that didn’t actually have to be looked up right now. Sometimes the distraction was quick, sometimes it was much longer. Either way, it reduced my focus and took my energy.

I also realized that I sometimes avoided checking my calendar as often as I should because I didn’t want to deal with the onslaught of stimulation — including, embarrassingly, once missing a meeting because of it!

Switching to a paper calendar was a big improvement for me. I can check my calendar ten times a day — and often do — without getting sucked into anything else. Of course, it’s not a perfect solution; in some contexts, I will coordinate with others using electronic calendars. I just write down those meetings on my paper calendar, too, since that’s my master planner.

To be fair, many of us wouldn’t be able to do this at work — the flow of how our time gets planned necessitates an electronic calendar there. But many of us, at the very least, would be able to do it in our personal lives.

2. I took email off of my phone

When email was on my phone, I checked my email — unnecessarily — all the time. And, of course, it frequently led me to doing other things on my phone, too.

Taking email off of my phone radically reduced both of those problems. And, in the rare case that I actually do need to check an email, I can use my phone’s internet browser — which is enough of a bother that I rarely do it.

Of course, I not-infrequently need information from my email while I’m out of the house. In those situations, I write down the information or put it in my Notes app (I have a Mac and an iPhone, so Notes syncs between the two devices — a great example of technology making my life better in a way that has no downside — for me, at least).

3. I use an analog to-do list.

In a past Tech With Intention group, one participant shared: I was trying to find the perfect to-do list app when I realized that I might be better off just writing my to-do’s on paper!

I think that’s such a great insight. Sure, to-do list apps have all kinds of fancy features, but what are the downsides? We might spend too much time puttering with all of those fancy features. Or the process of checking our online to-do list results in us doing other, non-useful things online.

4. There’s not much of anything fun on my phone

There’s no email, no games — really, nothing fun to do. I added Instagram to my phone recently, after more than 1.5 years off the platform, because I’ve started sharing about life coaching and eating topics there. (Here’s my account!) But I view that as a professional tool, so I follow very few accounts + try to limit use to working hours.

My phone feels like a useful tool: I can use it for directions, to listen to podcasts, to check the weather for next Thursday, or to call my mom. And, truthfully, I like it that way. For me, just because my phone could be a pleasure-device, doesn’t mean that’s what works best for me.



For me, as I’ve gathered the data on myself, there’s a very clear correlation between less time spent in front of a screen and:

  • A calmer nervous system,

  • A mind that can focus, prioritize, and do deep work with more ease

  • A happier life (That sounds cheesy, but it really has been true for me!)

So these tradeoffs make sense for me. Maybe there is some ease to be gained from having email on my phone, for example, but having a calmer nervous system is more important to me.   



I want to be clear: just because I have made decisions in this way, doesn’t mean you need to. Maybe having email on your phone, a to-do list app, or an electronic personal calendar is truly essential to your life — great!

But I hope, at least, that you might consider asking: is a given technological solution always the best one? What are the pros, and what are the cons?

As always, I’m rooting for you. You’ve got this.

Katie




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Two ways I use the internet less - without a full-scale digital detox

I’m very interested in how technology affects our well-being, and how we can use it more intentionally. I’ve written about this topic before (here and here), but here’s one phrase that’s been ping-ponging around my head recently:   

Just because some is good, doesn’t mean that more is better.

It’s easy to read that phrase and think, Of course. Duh.

But are you actually applying it in your relationship with technology? Do you actually say to yourself, for example, “I’ve noticed that 30 minutes of this app/activity/device brings me significant benefit, but past that point, do the downsides outweigh the positives?”

To give you some ideas of how to begin that process, I wanted to share how I’ve been applying it to one part of my relationship with technology: Internet browsing.

Katie Seaver, life coach, digital detox, using internet less, reducing screen time, unplugging from technology

Internet Browsing and Intentional Technology Usage

I’ll admit it: I love browsing the internet for pleasure. I use social media rarely at this point, but I still have blogs and websites that I love to read. Plus, occasionally watching SNL videos can be so fun! I think some amount of internet browsing is “good” for me because it brings me so much pleasure.

But I started noticing that because I enjoyed the internet so much, it was tempting to do it all the time. Oh, I just woke up? Why not look something up on the internet? Oh, I have a few hours after dinner? Why not spend all of it on the Internet?

I often felt like time would fly by – and like I never quite had enough of it. I also started wondering if the internet was actually giving me all the pleasure and relaxation that I thought it did.

So here are two things that I started to do, to implement “just because some is good, doesn’t mean that more is better” with my internet browsing:

1. Not using the Internet after dinner

I used to spend most of my after-dinner time on the Internet. I was tired from the day, there was nothing urgent to do, so why not? But I also noticed that I often felt emotionally tired at the end of my night, even after spending a significant amount of time online, which I thought helped me relax. I wondered whether the internet — even though it’s quite pleasurable — wasn’t letting me emotionally recover.

So I decided that I’d explore just not using the internet after dinner. Here are some of the interesting things I found:  

  • I felt calmer. The very first night I did this experiment, I read a book for three hours after dinner, when I might otherwise have been browsing the internet. When I finished reading, I thought to myself, “Wow, I feel so much calmer than I’ve felt in a while.” I noticed that my body felt noticeably less stressed than before, and my breathing was slower. This has proved to be consistently true and is the main reason I’ve stuck with it.

  • I felt like I had more time. Somehow, my evenings have started to feel longer, even though they are often actually shorter, because…

  • I went to bed earlier. When I stayed off the internet after dinner, I kept finding myself getting tired earlier than I used to. It makes perfect sense — there’s no shortage of research on the negative effect of technology use on sleep. But it felt different when it actually happened to me.

  • I woke up earlier. It turns out that when you go to bed earlier, you tend to wake up earlier, too. I love mornings and had always wanted to get up earlier without sacrificing sleep, so this was a big perk for me.

  • I read many more books. The week that I’m writing this alone, I’ve started and finished two novels, and read some chunks of good nonfiction. This is an above-average week (the novels were both pretty fast reads), but I read a lot now.

2. Keeping a list of the things I’d like to “check” online

The internet makes it possible to get an answer to nearly any question, instantaneously. As a result, very tempting to look up the answer to any question, the moment we have it. It’s so satisfying to get an immediate answer! And it only takes a second!

But I started noticing that I was doing a lot of little “quick checks” throughout my day and wondered whether it was affecting my productivity and focus. Plus, even if the answer to my question could be professionally or personally useful, it was rarely true that I needed the answer to the question right then. I could usually wait at least a few hours for the answer.

So that’s what I started to do – I started keeping a list of “things to look up online” on a Post-it throughout my day. Then once a day, usually around 4 p.m., I look up as many of them as I please. I’ve definitely noticed that it helps me stay focused on the task at hand throughout the day, and it’s actually fun to be able to look up a bunch of things at once.



I like internet browsing — some of it is good for me. But using it whenever I had some leisure time wasn’t great for me, as it turned out. by not using the internet after dinner, I help myself have a calm and spacious, and more truly rejuvenating end to my day.

Similarly, I like being able to look up answers to my questions on the internet — some of it is good for me. But batching it helps me make sure I’m focused on what matters, rather than getting micro-distracted throughout my day. I can still get the answers to any questions that matter — I just have to wait a bit.

I’ll also say that I don’t do either of these practices 100% of the time. I’m not perfect, by any means. The good news is that I don’t have to do them 100% of the time, to experience real benefit.

How could you implement “just because some is good, doesn’t mean that more is better” in an actionable, concrete way in your life?

As always, I’m rooting for you. You’ve got this.

Katie

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A few ways that I reduced my screen time

It was 8 pm. I’d just gotten home from a walk and planned to shower and make dinner. But first, I reached for my phone.

What if you didn’t?

It was a small, kind voice inside of me that asked the question. It wasn’t mean or accusatory. But I also knew it was on to something.

Katie Seaver, life coach, reducing screen time, how to use less technology, digital detox benefits, ways to unplug from technology

Lately, I’d started to wonder if I used technology too much. Previously, I had always thought of myself as a “slightly below average” technology user — I don’t follow that many people on social media, I don’t text that much, I don’t get that many emails. And yet, I found myself checking my phone or my laptop:

  • When I’ve just gotten home, but was still in my car — before walking into the house.

  • Right after arriving in my home, before doing anything else. I’d set down my bags, and check my email or my phone.

  • When I entered my office, before starting work.

  • In the middle of working.

  • In the morning, right when I woke up.

  • Right before bed.

Of course, there were other times I used the internet, too. A big part of my work is on the internet — it’s how I meet with clients who don’t live nearby, and it’s how I’m sending this letter to you. But that didn’t particularly concern me.

There was something about that first type of internet usage that did feel important to look at because it seemed like they fell into two categories:

  1. Transitional moments. I’ve talked about transitional moments in the context of eating before, but transitions are often times when we have more feelings than we realize. Say that we’ve just gotten home from work or seeing friends. We may carry within us some tiredness or even pent-up excitement from that past activity. Plus, traveling even short distances can be subtly draining, and then we are trying to focus on doing all the things we need to do when we get home. The point here is not that transitions are the most tiring things in the world. Rather, it’s that we are often more tired or overwhelmed than we realize in these moments. 

  2. Blow-off-steam moments. You know that feeling when you’ve been working for a couple of hours (or even just 20 minutes), and suddenly checking social media or your email or that blog you like sounds like a good idea? Or suddenly grabbing a snack sounds like a good idea? If we look deeper into these moments, we pretty quickly find something like I’m tired of working and I want less stress and more pleasure. So we use technology. Or food. Or something else.

It’s not that technology can’t be helpful to deal with the subtle tiredness of transitioning or blowing off steam. But it seemed like I was spending a lot of my day on technology — sometimes I would suddenly realize I’d been on Instagram for a half hour, for example, even though I just meant to do a “quick check.”

I also felt I had more trouble concentrating than I did when I was in high school. Back then, I didn’t have a smartphone and the computer in my bedroom could only do two things: word processing and solitaire.  I felt like my life wasn’t that busy now, but I was getting less done than I’d like, and I felt easily distracted.

I started to wonder if technology was actually the best way to deal with these transitions or blowing off steam.

...

So in that curious moment, when I was hungry and sweaty and really wanted to “just quickly” check Instagram on my phone…I didn’t.

I lay on my bed instead.

I lay on my bed and did nothing. Just lay there. I noticed what it felt like, to have not picked up my phone. It felt pretty intense in my body at first, like I might jump out of my skin. Then it died down quite a lot.

As I lay there, I realized that I had been feeling subtly overwhelmed. My early evening had been busy, and somehow the act of going straight into a shower and making dinner had seemed like slightly too much to do. No wonder I wanted to blow off some steam in that transition.

As I continued to lie there, I noticed other things. I paid attention to the ebbing and flowing of body sensations. I reflected on some things that had been making me feel insecure lately, and found some peace about them. I even had a couple of ideas about articles to write — which was surprising because I’d been low on writing ideas lately.

When I finally got up, I felt calmer and more grounded in my body. It wasn’t like everything was fixed — I still felt tired from the day, for example — but I was able to notice those feelings while also moving on to what needed to be done.



That night was a few weeks ago.  Since then, I’ve been trying to not use technology, at least sometimes, when I can tell that I’m using it for a transition or to blow off steam.

It doesn’t always feel great at first, to be honest. That jumping-out-of-my-skin feeling is usually there. So sometimes I’ll lie on my bed or even on the floor and just notice my thoughts and feelings and body sensations. I’ll let them be a little more intense for a few moments, and then let them ebb away.

I’m just making small experiments so far, but they’ve been useful. Last night, when I was about to browse the internet after dinner, I stayed off screens and read for three hours instead. I was surprised at how refreshed I felt, and how much my stress level seemed to lower.  

So that’s my offering for you this week: Is there something that you worry isn’t serving you? Can you experiment with, just once, not doing it? Intense feelings and body sensations might come up, at first. Can you sit with them, at least for a little while?

I’d love to know how it goes.

As always, I’m rooting for you. You’ve got this.

Katie

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