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Job descriptions + burnout (Your Engine, Part IV)
I’m starting this year by sharing two core concepts that I find most helpful to my clients — our compass + our engine. We spent a few weeks on compasses (1, 2, 3), and now we’re talking about engines (1,2,3).
Today, I wanted to talk about the final common engine challenge: keeping your engine going on the road, for the long term.
There’s many concepts that help with this, but today I’ll just share one.
It’s this: Choose your job description carefully.
To me, a “job description” is the definition of what tasks you are signed up to do, and how “success” is measured.
Most of us have “job descriptions” — implicit or explicit — at work.
We also have them — typically implicitly — in every other part of our lives. We might have job descriptions for how we are supposed to show up as a parent, as a partner, as a friend, as a painter, as a runner.
I’ve found that many of us have often un-useful, sometimes actively-harmful job descriptions.
One recently client’s (implicit) Job Description at work was the following:
Do every task that is asked of me perfectly — in a way that is thorough and detailed.
Volunteer for every additional opportunity to help that arises, and do those at an extremely high level of quality, as well.
Based on that job description, can you guess how my client was feeling?
If you guessed “exhausted, behind on work, overwhelmed, and bad at her job (despite getting great feedback from her boss),” you’re right!
…
Of course, given her Job Description, none of this is a surprise.
She had a job with potential tasks that could take two full-time employees’ time. It simply wasn’t possible to do every task at the level of thoroughness that she desired. As a result, of course she often felt behind, exhausted, and like she was avoiding the most important things.
We did many things in our work together, but one of them was to revise her job description.
Eventually, it was something like this:
Use her expertise to prioritize the most important tasks.
Communicate clearly with her many stakeholders, so everyone knows when she will get back to them with what they need — even if it’s not immediately.
Make sure she tackles the most important tasks with her peak cognitive sharpness, and also to rest and take appropriate breaks (like mid-day exercise), so she can maintain that sharpness over the course of the day.
Three things were fantastic about this job description:
When she followed this job description, she was more effective at work, not less.
She got the most important things done in a timely manner (which she used to avoid, because many of those important tasks were also cognitively tiring) — and she didn’t feel behind on the less important things, because she has communicated clearly about deadlines so stakeholders knew what to expect.She felt calmer, happier, and well-rested.
Before, she’d often work late, and struggled to get exercise in. Now, she exercised most lunch breaks, and stopped at a reasonable hour. And her days were calmer, because she wasn’t feeling guilty or anxious that she wasn’t getting to the most important thing.And, also, she felt more effective.
Before, she often felt bad at her job – because she was often failing at the job description she had created for herself. Now, she could feel successful — because she could satisfy her own job description.
And, of course, when you feel both more effective, and also calmer, happier, and well-rested…it’s a lot easier to keep that engine engaged in the long term.
…
This week, I invite you to pick one area of your life – it could be at your job, or as a parent, homeowner, or friend. Then reflect:
What implicit job description are you living with?
What would you like your job description to be?
Happy Engine Month, everyone ☺ As always, I’m rooting for you.
Katie
p.s. Want to work with me 1:1? So many of us have lives that look pretty good on paper, but feel a little “off” or not-right.
Working with folks like that is my specialty.
I help my clients gain clarity + make progress towards lives that feel profoundly right to them. Along the way, they cultivate more authenticity, build more meaningful relationships, heal from burnout, have more fun, finally accomplish that important project, and much more.
Learn more about working with me here.
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My intentions: Holiday burnout edition
Thanksgiving is done, December lies ahead.
Whew.
If you’re anything like me, you might not need more “self development ideas and insights” in this exact moment. You might feel a little full-to-the-brim with a combination of turkey, pecan pie, and social plans.
So instead, I wanted to ask: what are your intentions for December?
When I close my eyes, take a deep breath, and really answer that question, here’s my honest answer: I want to take good care of myself in December.
My life has been — shall we say — energetically expensive this year (actually, the past two or three years, but who’s counting?). I’ve been saving as much energy as I can, but the “energy bill” is coming in high nonetheless.
If I’m being honest, I felt some grief that “take good care of myself” was my honest intention for December.
I would have preferred a more “glamorous” answer, like:
Really enjoy the holiday season!
Make tons of holiday memories!
Go sledding and have an incredible birthday party and really decorate for Christmas!
But my honest answer remained the same: I want to take good care of myself this month.
And look, holidays will be had. I’m excited to light a menorah with my 3-year-olds, to decorate a tree, to make Christmas cookies.
But also, I’m purposefully keeping things simple:
I’d like to eventually have more holiday décor for our home, but I won’t be buying it this year. #I’vemadeenoughdecisionsalready
My birthday is in December, and I often enjoy a party with friends, but this year will just be a small, family dinner.
We’ll probably wait to make Christmas cookies until the new year. (Hey, chocolate-dipped shortbread also tastes delicious on January 1!)
I wish I had more “glamorous” intentions… but I don’t. Yes, I feel some grief about that — but I also feel profound gratitude towards myself, for listening so carefully to my deepest desires.
…
I share this personal note, not because you care when I make chocolate-dipped shortbread cookies — but with the hopes that it gives you permission to honestly acknowledge your most authentic intentions.
Whether you want to play or hibernate, grow or contract, connect or fall apart – I hope you’ll give yourself a loving ear, and follow what you hear.
What are your intentions for December? I’ll be rooting for you.
Katie
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2 (easy) ideas for when you're emotionally and mentally exhausted
Among the many things that I help my clients with, one category is what I’d call “feeling better” (we could call that “feeling less anxious” “feeling less tired” or even, “going from good to thriving,” depending on the client).
If you’ve been getting this newsletter for a while, you know that I have lots of ideas on how to do just that — from a two-day prescription, to ideas for intrepid intentional tech adventurers.
Today, I thought it might be nice to share 2 no-brainer ideas. For me, “no brainers” are not hard, don’t require a much (if any) emotional energy, and are at least slightly fun.
If you’re already doing both of these, awesome! If you’re not, they’re pretty no-brainer ones to add to your life.
Here they are:
1. Read a physical book or magazine for 30 minutes.
Design magazines or romance novels (my favorites) count. So do celebrity gossip magazines or Revolutionary War histories (just finished this, 100 pages into this). Anything counts as long as it is a physical reading material.
Just get off of your phone or laptop or TV and read something. Do it for 30 minutes. If you haven’t been reading much that’s not an internet article lately, it may be a bit hard to focus. That’s okay. Just practice, and it’ll get much easier.
I find it astonishing how much my breathing slows down, how much my nervous system calms down, when I read a physical book.
For extra credit, go for a full hour.
2. Take a walk.
Walk to your corner and back. Walk around the block. Or, sure, walk for 45 minutes or an hour. But if you’re anxious or overwhelmed, if you’re not walking…you need to start walking.
I know, I know: I’m so overwhelmed. Walking won’t help. Walking won’t fix it.
I dare you: Go take a walk. Email me if you don’t feel better afterward.
…
On one hand: maybe these feel “obvious” to you.
On the other hand: are you feeling low-level anxious, tired, or overwhelmed today? Have you done both of these things?
You’ve got this.
Katie
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