The altruistic case for work-life balance
Today I want to tell you about an extraordinarily successful guy I know. Very high up in his company, and he seems to keep climbing every time I talk to him.
But my favorite thing about him? He profoundly values work-life balance.
He lives by the beach, and wants to be surfing, paddle-boarding, and playing tennis. And even more importantly, wants to spend time with his family: he eats breakfast and dinner with his wife and three young kids, and spends all weekend boogie boarding and biking around town with them.
This is not the norm at his organization. He has had many managers who worked enormous numbers of hours, who did not have time to spend with their families — and whose health and personal relationships seriously suffered, as a result.
He decided he didn’t want to make that sacrifice. So he didn’t.
(This is not to say it was always easy or that he doesn’t work hard when he is working — it wasn’t always, and he does.)
Something I absolutely love about his story, is how his choices have helped the people around him.
Several of his direct reports told him that watching him gave them more ambition.
“Before I worked for you, I wasn’t sure of how much I wanted to advance in my career,” one direct report — a mom herself — told him. “It seemed impossible to enjoy my life, enjoy my family, and keep advancing at work. But watching you…it showed me that it could be done.”
It showed me that it could be done.
…
When I talk to my clients about cultivating more work-life balance (which for many exhausted folks often involves working fewer hours) — it can often feel wildly selfish.
It can feel extra hard – and extra selfish — if many people at your organization don’t seem to have good work-life balance.
But what if cultivating work-life balance was actually the least selfish thing you could do?
What if it was a profoundly altruistic move — a gift — to be a role model to others?
What if they might say to you later: “Thank you, *thank you* for showing me it could be done.”
…
If you won’t cultivate work-life balance for yourself, or your family, or your friends…
… at least do it for your colleagues, as an act of service.
As always, I’m rooting for you. You’ve got this.
Katie
p.s. I coach clients on all kinds of relationship issues — with their families, their partners, their friends, their online dating profiles — and on everything from difficult conversations to people pleasing to loneliness to fostering deeper connection to setting effective boundaries (which often function differently than we assume). If you’d like to work with me, you can learn more here.
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